Asher Roth blows.

I'm sure you've heard 'I Love College' at this point. The ubiquitous frat-boy anthem has been all over radio and MTV, care of pigment-free rapper Asher Roth and Warner Music Group (so groundbreaking!). I've been on rants about how much ass this song has sucked since day one, with the faux-Kanyeisms in the verse and the lazily performed chorus -- I can't help but call bullshit.



But something was nagging me on this one. Maybe it was the lyrics, which were a little too reminiscent of my own time in school, or maybe it was the suspicion that I was hating merely because it's some overprivileged whitey rapping. Then I realized what it was, why I couldn't 100% dismiss this dude --

This song is an amazing country song.

Look at the lyrics, and the chorus! This track is right up the alley of "Chicken Fried" or "I Love This Bar", complete with verses listing stuff that Mr. Roth likes, the classic contemporary country move on display in yesterday's BFMH post. The chorus even has the laid-back tinge of tracks from Brad Paisley or even Garth Brooks, except delivered in a focus group-tried deadpan engineered to appeal to the ringtone set, not the Wrangler crowd. Still, lyrics like "hold the beer bong / nothing wrong with a little fun / even if we did get a little too gone," Roth can't fool me with his shitty marketing plan -- he wrote a country drinkin' song.

If you amp up the twang on the song, you kind of have a contemporary country killer, as evidenced by Youtube fan William King...



I'm not saying it's country because he's a white dude rapping, I'm saying that if you write a country song and dress it up as hip hop, it'll be as shitty as Asher Roth. So, Mr. Roth, once you put down the mic and pick up a cowboy hat, we can be cool.

Til then, Asher Roth fucking blows.